Sybil's back to school experience

Our daughter, Sybil (5) who is a profoundly deaf cochlear implant user, had a wonderful start to her reception year in September 2020. Like many families, we were gutted by the news that schools needed to close again in January.

As Sybil has an Education Health and Care plan, she was offered a school place during the closure period, and after much deliberation we decided to take it. Her teachers were fantastic at ensuring she was well-supported and things were kept as ‘normal’ as possible for the children in school (while the teachers were also teaching remotely – they are amazing!) Sybil missed her friends who weren’t in school, but it was a great experience for her overall. The smaller class size made for a good listening environment and support from school meant she settled well into ‘lockdown school’.

We had a couple of self-isolation periods so had to switch to home learning, which was challenging. Sybil can’t hear videos well through laptop speakers, so became frustrated. Our younger son has not yet mastered the art of playing quietly, so I was competing with a lot of background noise (mostly shouting about Paw Patrol!) In the end we increased his mornings at playgroup to keep things quiet, and I watched the school videos ahead of time so I was able to repeat and explain the content to Sybil. We also plugged her radio aid into the computer to stream sound directly to her cochlear implants.

I’ve heard it said during the current crisis that children have shown amazing resilience and adaptability. I absolutely agree, but as parents we see anxieties and worries manifesting themselves in our children in ways that others don’t see. Sybil has been a star through the pandemic, but she’s been struggling with nightmares and restless nights, particularly during times of upheaval like school closures. It was a big relief to learn that schools would be returning in March.

On the first Monday morning Sybil was so excited you would have thought it was Christmas! She was so eager to see her friends that when it was time to go into school she barely gave me a backwards glance! She had a brilliant first week. It was, however, another big adjustment, and her exhaustion was apparent.

I think it’s difficult to explain to people how much listening fatigue affects deaf children. Almost all young children are completely shattered and emotional at the end of a long school day. But, the extra effort involved in using hearing technology, deciphering sentences when words may have been missed, filtering out background noise, and so on, results in a deep exhaustion that we, as hearing parents, will never fully be able to comprehend. The need to concentrate doesn’t stop at the end of the school day – even more listening is required at home, which lumps tiredness on top of tiredness. We give Sybil the option of taking off her processors at the end of the school day, but she rarely does. We’ve been trying to encourage quiet activities, like Lego or drawing, as well as sticking to a pretty rigid post-school routine. The aim is to wind her down and get her to bed with minimal stress. Still, the evenings often end with tears as she struggles to control her tiredness, and that’s exactly what’s happened since school has re-opened. It’s early nights all round in our house for the foreseeable! 

As the first few weeks back draw to a close we’re settling into a more normal routine and enjoying hearing all about reception life from Sybil. Here’s hoping for a nice, boring, completely predictable rest of the school year!